I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
