I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
