come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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