I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
