Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
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ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
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