Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
