i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Randomize
