: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
