Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
