Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize