I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
