trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize