I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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