Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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