I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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