i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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