Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
If its not for food we ain't going out.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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