you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Randomize
