I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
