i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on a dog bed..
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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