I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize
