i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
