Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
What a dumb baby whore.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
