Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
