After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Randomize