I wish my penis had an off switch
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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