I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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