Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
