Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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