upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Randomize