It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
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