Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.

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(805): View more from California

she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.

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(507): View more from Minnesota

Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Walk of Shame time yet?

(1+44): View more from

Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?

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23 Annoying things Girls Do When They’re Trying To Be Cute
Read it at the TFLN blog
(813): View more from Florida

the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'

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(260): View more from Indiana

I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me

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(317): View more from Indiana

Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.

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