so explain again why im purple
no
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize
