look no pants
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize