I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
