nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
they call him Oral-B. enough said
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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