Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize