I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
do herpes really smell.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
