Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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