I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
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Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
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omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.