i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
