if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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