She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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