Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
