sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
