why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
