I need help removing her.
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
i may or may not be watching the land before time
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.