Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize
