Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I hate all girls vehemently.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
