this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
