just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
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